Sunday, September 28, 2008

Propitiation

Unquenched cravings, eternal thoughts and an irrefutable present, these are aces of my day break, when I wake up from my ever transient dreams. For a moment, it becomes too grueling to accept the present in lieu of the feasible future. Thoughts and dreams alike remain symbolic to the 'mirror of the erised'. They cast a reflection of the way I want to see things at a distant time which signifies neither possibility nor improbability. It vents out my imminent quest, the journey I have been longing for and the journey which I should embark.

Often in my life, I ascribe this realization as to being ineffable but it is not really so. It consists of amorphous aspirations with foundation in an incipient state. An Utopian world where fleeting thoughts are not so fleeting, fancy is actuality and insatiability propitiates the very cause for which a human being is born. In fact desire satiates both deed and dream. As I write these lines I feel an intense desire to transcend the verbose and express myself in a few short lucid lines, as do the great philosophers and thinkers. But I feel I am incapable of doing it so. After all, it is not easy to easily express every bit of thought or every ounce of emotion. Neither do I stand remotely even in the verge of doing so. Yet my verve to convey myself remains unfettered, unaltered in seemingly immortal verities.

The most difficult thing to achieve in one's lifetime is an inconspicuous object called integrity. The thing which cannot be bundled with comparative or superlative degrees. A thing which can exist only in an absolute sense. It simply exists or is non-existent. This is one thing which I yearn for in this life. I do not want to look upto anyone else but myself. This is the only thing that preserves the pristine sanctity of life devoid of either joy or sorrow. Idealism is a variable whereas integrity is an absolute unpossessed by any kind of relative sense, idealism may or may not be its verisimilitude.

Time follows a linear theme forever having neither digression nor pre-meditation. It is supposedly we who caper with it and land up in prevalently inopportune quantums of time. However insurmountable, incapable of defeat the situation appears to be, we should be standing tall in front of it. The only unparalleled weapon to fight their kind is integrity of a human.

I look upto the life which is beyond so that I live to conquer the apparently fleeting bliss of it. It is an expedition which is both introspective and prospective in nature. It is neither an illusion nor an allusion to idealism. My only pondering is, why I want to do so. An imperfect life with a perfect probability still prevails with its endearment to one desirous journey.